The End is Near!
I’ve started this post 56
times, maybe more. Too glib. Too serious. Too something.
My tour in Afghanistan is
over. Well, almost.
As I write this, I’m not quite home.
As a Reservist, I have to go to a gulag known as North Fort Hood for
demobilization. This is the military process of turning you back in to a pumpkin…but the French toast in the Dining Facility is
fantastic, so I’m okay.
I have a million thoughts
and contradictory emotions going through my mind, each trying to occupy the
same space I am excited to be
home. I am terrified to be home. I can’t wait for things to get back to what
was normal. I want things to be
different. I’m so glad to not see the
exact same people when I go to the shower, breakfast, lunch, dinner, gym,
office, church etc. I already miss
them. Well, okay, not all of them, but
just about. I don’t want to think about
Afghanistan. I don’t ever want to forget
it. It was an amazing experience that
few people have. I don’t really want to
do it again.
I can’t wait to see my wife
and children. I’m looking forward to
BBQ, Christmas with the family, a return to being an assistant prosecutor, and a
bathroom in the same zipcode as my bed.
I’m also ready to live on the edge…you know…without the “Big Voice”
telling me when lightning has been seen within 5 nautical miles of the
base, walking around in the evening
without a reflective belt, and running while wearing earphones (oh, the
humanity!).
Just as I laugh at a memory,
or think of another, “one time, at fat camp” story, I remember. Twelve soldiers passed before my salute,
covered by our Nation’s flag. I didn’t
know most of them. I don’t recall names,
but I remember sending them home. I
didn’t do anything noteworthy, as they did. I am not a hero, as they are. Frankly, my wife and children made greater personal sacrifices than were
asked of me in the combat zone. That
said, I don’t think anyone can be witness to war and not affected in some
way. I have been given a gift those men
were denied. I feel compelled to do
something with it. I don’t yet know what.
My thoughts then turn to the
people I had the privilege of serving with.
They will forever be the people I served with in Afghanistan. Accountants, cops, lawyers, students,
teachers, and engineers coming together from Florida, Missouri, Texas,
Washington, New Mexico, Arizona, Virginia and South Carolina to make a base in
a combat zone run smoothly. It was
amazing to see.
What a ride! I think it may just take a while to process
things. Maybe you just shove it all in a
mental box and drive the kids to practice.
I don’t know.
